Monday, September 08, 2008

Bleeding and Angry

No comment needed for this lyric, finished today.

Bleeding and Angry

(c) 2008, Jon Trott


Oh Jesus when I loved you as a young man
I didn’t know how many blood red nights would pass
I thought my life would fill with joy and light
But that cross you promised cuts my heart like glass
This country that I love like sky and rain and hope
Has used your name and gone insane
Fake wars that are too real, Abu Ghraib electric rope
Every bomb, kill and maim, takes Your name in vain
And the people you call yours are bastards, I am one
Who kiss the butt of power, who think right’s a loaded gun

I shouldn’t say these things
I’m not feeling full of faith
I’m filled with tears and indignation
Until we stop this I don’t feel safe
I’m… bleeding and angry
I’m… bleeding and angry

"This is God’s will," they say, "this is love this is right."
The ticking clock reads just ‘round midnight
"We’re good you’re bad you’re false we’re true"
Little palin’ cheerleader spreads their hate of you
Doing the McRovian hula and you’re the hoop
A flag wrapped Jesus, Abu Ghraib, devil’s in the coop
Country First, which means Us First and We Rule
While Jesus is dyin’ on a New Orleans stoop
And the people you call yours are the bastards -- I am one!
Who kiss their own constructions as God’s True Son

God you don't have to hear my scream
But god-talk will not make Pilate's bloody hands clean
Nothing I’ve known is half as good as you, but –
Jesus, wake your Church from this myopic dream
I’m… bleeding and angry
I’m… bleeding and angry

The politics of change crushed by politics of fear
and I cry in my sleep at night afraid Hope's no longer here.
Wickedness seems so universal, good so small.
I know I verge on blasphemy, in the suffering of it all.
Give me your eyes, heal my self-inflicted wounds.
Help me to keep carrying my tiny cross of dooms.
Intelligence and wisdom often walk so far apart
Humility is what I need, a human bleeding heart
I know these truths, adhere to You, Word of God
But Jesus I'm angry, Jesus I'm bleeding, how do I start?

Save my neighbor, Love of my Life.
Save my friends and children and wife.
But dear Lord Jesus, Save my enemy
And if I still seem worth it, rescue me...
I'm bleeding and angry.
I'm bleeding and angry.

2 comments:

Heather said...

Hi, I am currently reading Geisler & Meister's Reasons for Faith, and came across your article on Satanism. I am so glad you wrote what you did. I am saved, had been heavily into the occult, and one of the things that used to make me sneer at Christians was their ignorance of the occult, and their hyperboles regarding what was practiced. No good is served by not knowing what the people believe when you practice apologetics. More harm and wedges between the person and God can be created. I am so glad that I met a great pastor who was able to address all my issues and ultimately help me to make Jesus the Lord of my life. What you shared was invaluable. Thank you
Heather

Jon Trott said...

Heather,

That means a lot to me. Frankly, I felt a bit out of place in Reasons for Faith, as it reflects an approach to Christian Apologetics I have a hard time relating to these days. Perhaps I'm a victim of the so-called "Culture Wars," but that chapter on Satanism is very much at the heart of my current understanding of Christianity itself. When seeking for the source of Evil, look within. I try to do that. I am frightened and saddened by those who do not seem to have a self-reflective ability. And finally, I think suffering with Jesus and in Jesus is where our faith is proven -- not because we want to suffer (because what sane person desires suffering?!) but rather because we want to become more like our Beloved. Again, it moves me that you found the chapter useful; some things I write seem to me useless and pointless -- just me playing the role of "contrarian" or "crank." Blessings to you.